The following alleged notice in a US national park advised fishermen, hikers, and other visitors to take extra precautions and to be on the alert for bears whilst in the area.

"Visitors are advised to wear noise-producing devices such as little bells on their clothing to alert but not startle the bears unexpectedly.

"They also advise you watch for signs of bear activity, and to carry a pepper spray in case of an encounter with a bear.

"People should be able to recognise the differences between black bear and grizzly bear droppings.

"Black bear droppings are smaller and contain berries and possibly squirrel fur.

"Grizzly bear droppings are large, have bells in them, and smell like pepper spray."
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A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would be red in the face."

"Yes", they all said.

"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"

A little boy shouted: "'Cos your feet ain't empty."

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A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments. After explaining the commandment to "honour thy father and thy mother", she asked if was a commandment that says how we should treat our brothers and sisters.

Without hesitation a little boy (eldest in his family) answered : "Thou shalt not kill".